Communicate with Clarity and Kindness
We spend so much of our lives communicating—talking, writing, listening, even conversing in our own minds. Our communication shapes the quality of our relationships, and through them, the quality of our lives.
Yet most of us receive little conscious training in this essential life skill. We absorb communication habits from family, school, culture, and society—often unconsciously. This leaves us unprepared for some of the most important moments in life, both personally and professionally.
Mindful communication brings awareness, honesty, and care into our relationships. We learn to pause, listen deeply, and speak with clarity and compassion. The resources below offer practical tools to build stronger connections at home, at work, and in the world. Explore at your own pace—read an article, watch a short talk, or begin a full course of study.
Start Here: How to Stop Arguing
Start your communication journey. Learn six key principles to get out of habitual arguments and shift a conversation from conflict to understanding.
Foundations of Mindful Communication
Explore the core teachings of Oren’s integrated approach to Mindful Communication.
Books and Courses
About the Book: In Say What You Mean, Oren Jay Sofer offers a unique and pragmatic approach to deepening and improving relationships by transforming our patterns of speaking and listening. With a step-by-step approach for lasting changes in our fundamental orientation to communication, Oren brings a clear, new voice to the world of interpersonal communication.
“No other book I’ve read has helped me with my ability to communicate in my work as much as this book has.”
About the Course: A companion to the best selling book, this two-part online course provides step-by-step guidance to transform your conversations. Oren’s integrated approach to communication training draws from decades of training in Buddhist meditation, Nonviolent Communication, and somatic trauma healing. Find the right words when it matters most.
“Oren’s online course was one of the best learning experiences in my 30+ year career!”
Mindful Communication Articles
Explore reflections and teachings on mindful communication in daily life.
Join me and Roxy Manning for four days of practice in Nonviolent Communication, grounding, and community.
What is spiritual practice for in times like these? On parenting, grief, and learning to speak in service of life.
Video: Finding our Ground in a Divided World, Keynote Address at Washington University of St. Louis
What we say—and how we listen—matters more than ever. Even amidst conflict or collapse, the way we speak can be a refuge, a bridge, a seed of something new.
Today marks one year since the Hamas attacks in Israel, and nearly that long since Israel’s retaliation in Gaza and the West Bank began—a year of loss, unimaginable grief, spiraling violence, and a growing humanitarian crisis.
Practical strategies for navigating holiday conversations with clarity, skill, and love.
Today my heart is breaking, out of universal values for peace, dignity, and respect, my commitment to nonviolence, the particular pain of my people, and of all those affected by these recent events.
Predatory listening can take many forms: listening with a narrow focus to find fault or confront someone; lying in wait for something to be offended by; deliberately trying to catch someone out; or listening only to gather evidence for a rebuttal.
Whether our conversations are in real life or on the internet, it can be hard to know the right thing to say right now. Mindful communication teacher Oren Jay Sofer shares his advice.
Systemic racism and white supremacy are in you, in me, and in all of us. Here are some reflections on putting our meditation practice into action where it counts.
If you’re feeling stuck, here are ten things you can do to stand for justice, show solidarity, and take action to stop white- and state-sanctioned violence.
There is a saying in many spiritual traditions, “Only speak if you can improve upon the silence.” There’s also a time and a place to speak up.
In an age of online connection, record numbers feel depressed and alienated. How can we bring more sanity to our news consumption?
In a world where attention is a commodity, reclaiming your attention is a radical act of self-empowerment. Here are three ways you can train your attention.
Watch this 45-minute talk introducing key Mindful Communication principles and practices.
The Buddhist path can be mistaken for a solitary affair, striving for enlightenment independently. The nature of the practice is something else entirely…
Having a clear and positive intention can transform a dialogue. Learn more in this excerpt from “Say What You Mean.”
The success of our relationships, our work, and life in general rests heavily on communication, yet few of us ever receive explicit training in this area.
Communication skills aren’t solely for difficult moments. They’re also meant to help us enhance our relationships and enjoy those we love more fully.
Family gatherings can be stressful. Here are five communication tips to make the holidays a little happier…
Difficult conversations are a part of life. Mindful communication gives us the tools, strength, and confidence to navigate tough situations when they arise.
Listening is a cornerstone of dialogue and a powerful metaphor for spiritual practice. This excerpt from Say What You Mean explores the inner meaning of listening.
These four principles build our primary relationship with students, strengthen healthy classroom culture, and support learning-readiness.
An exploration of the connection between gun violence, gender, and societal norms of masculinity.
One of the most pervasive challenges we face today as a species is overcoming the feeling of helplessness. It’s a learned sensation, which means it can be unlearned.
Free Tools & Mindful Communication Talks
Explore talks, guided meditations, worksheets, and handouts to support your study of Say What You Mean and your practice of mindful communication.
Empathy Cards and Games
Made for facilitators, therapists, coaches, educators, leaders and parents, GROK Games build empathy through play. Click here to explore GROK games, facilitation materials, and books.
Note: Oren receives a small commission from your purchase.Get the skills you need to listen deeply, speak clearly, and make a difference with this online course series. Join thousands of others who have taken this transformative training.
Exclusive opportunity for past graduates: Integrating mindful communication takes time, practice, and support. Join Oren for monthly Q&A sessions for ongoing learning and coaching.
4-day online retreat focused on embodying the tools and principles of Nonviolent Communication, led by Oren Jay Sofer and Roxy Manning. SPACE IS LIMITED - register early.
Free online event: Interactive session exploring practical ways to work with conflict with Oren and Roxy, certified NVC Trainers.
Exclusive opportunity for past graduates: Integrating mindful communication takes time, practice, and support. Join Oren for monthly Q&A sessions for ongoing learning and coaching.
Build transformative communication skills in a supportive learning community one weekend per month (online) with this powerful 8-month program.
Exclusive opportunity for past graduates: Integrating mindful communication takes time, practice, and support. Join Oren for monthly Q&A sessions for ongoing learning and coaching.
Exclusive opportunity for past graduates: Integrating mindful communication takes time, practice, and support. Join Oren for monthly Q&A sessions for ongoing learning and coaching.
Support the Teachings
These teachings are offered freely. If they’ve been meaningful to you, consider supporting Oren’s work through a donation.

Watch this 45-minute talk introducing key Mindful Communication principles and practices.